Wedded Bliss?


As our wedding approaches with ever-increasing speed, Jay and I have been busily working our way down a detailed to-do list. Our latest endeavor was going to the town hall to get our marriage license.

Being the organized, plan-ahead types that we are, we'd already called to find out exactly what documents we needed to bring, how much the license cost, and how far ahead we could get it, so we were well-prepared when we arrived at the town hall. After filling out the license application and paying the $24 fee, we stood at the counter and waited for one of the women in the town clerk's office to type up the form. It was then that her co-worker gave us The Bag.

The Bag was a sealed pink plastic bag with "Congratulations" written on it. Underneath it said that inside were some gifts to get us off to a good start on married life. Given that the bag was very light and flat, I immediately knew it didn't contain anything we really needed, like new towels or a set of flatware. Nonetheless, it was a gift, so we opened and began pulling out the contents, one unbelievable item at a time.

First there was an ad with a form to order checks. This was followed by a sample of quick acting, no water needed to take them, Excedrin tablets. Next came the sample-sized Pepto-Bismol, followed by laundry detergent and fabric softener. Last but not least was a sample of aromatherapy body wash - but only enough for one. Clearly there was a message here: Married life is full of financial issues, headaches, indigestion, and dirty laundry. And forget about passion - you'll be showering alone.

Good thing we'd already paid for the license, or we might have had to go think it over.